"Oh Abe... you've aged terribly." - Grandma Simpson- Yes, I'm now '38' and feeling my years. When I play basketball, people no longer laugh because of my shot selection or motion, its the sight of an ox lumbering to the hole or a man sticking out his chest to take a charge, only to have the offender run right around him for a lay-up.
- April fool's day always involves pranks. A good one I pulled on my mission was during my time in the office. We called two zone leaders at the same time on a conference call, hit the mute button and hoped they'd pick-up at the same time. Here is what ensued: "Hello / ...Hey! / How are you? / Gooooood... / And you? / Good / [5 second pause] So, what can I do ya for? / Me? / Yeah / You called me / No... you called me / What? / Look. The phone rang, I picked the phone, you were on the other end... WHAT DO YOU WANT!? / Dude. You called me. / I did not! - At that point we unmuted our laughter. Good times.
- When I was a senior in High School seminary, I made a Freshman drink eight cups of water on a dare that he couldn't do it in under 10 seconds (4 oz cups). We lined up the cups and he started chugging. He wound up puking after the third cup. The teacher ran into the kitchen furious with me and made me sit right in front of her with no one allowed to sit around me for the rest of the semester.
- Jay Culter is a whiny spoiled brat and I say good riddance. Josh McDaniels clearly has no sense of tact and will ruin our franchise. Buzz (the agent) is pond scum and deserves to have all his players taken from him Jerry McGuire style, minus finding the Quan and should be left to live in a van, down by the river.
- The Denver Sports media are the most asinine, repetitive and unbalanced bunch in the country. 4 hours a day talking about Jay with his panties in a bind and who said this and who said that... blah, blah, blah. The NUGGETS ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF THEIR BEST SEASON LIKE EVER!!! TALK ABOUT THEM YOU IDIOTS!!! Maybe they can't because the don't know anything about basketball, match ups, playoff implications, injuries, trades, the coach, strategy... NOOOOO. That would be too useful and entertaining. Yes, this is a Football town, always will be, but let's enjoy a good thing while its here rather than completely ignore it.
OK. I'm done. Hope you all feel special today like I do. Because in the end, we're all special and we are all unique. I'm gonna go get my cake on. MOSIT. YEAH!!
3 comments:
I assume at the end you meant to say, moist, as opposed to mosit. ;)
Who's the 38-year-old in the first recollection?
I loved the mission deal.
(FYI, my wife would have personally slit your throat had you gone through with the Chicago prank. Did you see how many friends and coworkers I duped with Harvard?)
Amen to the Broncos talk, even if I never hear a single word of it!
By the way, did I tell you I'm most likely going to win my office's MM bracket even though I know nothing of college basketball and did not and will not have watched a single game!
The irony, I love it!
MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Yes, often those who don't follow the season do best in the tornament. I suppose I could edit the post for spelling, but why hide my pathetic spelling?
As I was looking at my dashboard today and saw your nifty Vader shot, I thought to myself:
WHERE DOES HE GET THOSE WONDERFUL TOYS!
I am truly jealous/impressed by your consistent pick (as in apples) of pictures.
Well done, Harry, well done.
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