AVENGE ME!!!!!!!

Stan Lee and the folks at Marvel are idiots. I don't care if Spider-man wasn't part of the original 1963 Avengers squad. If you are going to make the Bellagio buffet of comic book movies and Spider-man is in your arsenal, YOU USE HIM!!!

Since 75% of this film is the Avengers fighting each other, why not show Spidey dodging smashes from the Hulk? Or making Thor swing his hammer into his forehead? In two words from the YouTube generation:

Now we get to see the same Spider-man movie made about a decade ago, because some studio executives had to have TWO big summer movies and figured it would be easier to re-boot the franchise the same way Batman Begins did. But guess what?

Its already doomed to EPIC FAILURE.

Why?

It looks like the same panty-waist whiner as Peter Parker that we had last time. Let's face it. We all got sick of his never-ending blubbering about living below the poverty line and pining over the "girl next door." Why should we pay to see that again? Why can't Spider-man hold down a reasonable job and flat in Manhattan, afford take-out 3x per week and date an investment banker who doesn't mind him leaving all the time?

But I digress. The Avengers was a great movie. A true fan-boy ORGY of multiple heroes with massive explosions, action, comedy and a reasonably coherent plot. Best part? Near the end, the Hulk absolutely destroys the villain like a rag doll. I nearly died laughing.

However, I'm getting old and I think I much prefer movies focused on one hero with more plot and character development. How do I say it? Something more intellectually and emotionally satisfying. I can't believe I just typed that. Now that I'm going to heck for snobs. I'll leave this post in peace and hope you enjoy the Avengers at least 50% as much as I did.