Weekend Warrior 2016 Part II

Once again the Norse Gods have conspired to send my Boss off on a quest to defeat Ragnarok with her perfect shapely legs... but leaving me alone with the mess I created.

So I determined to have the most effective, powerful, kick-butt Saturday of all times. I started out making the list on Friday night.

YEAH. She said that!! Now as Ben Franklin rolls in his grave, let's turn to a legit contemporary wise man on the art of war:

ONE OF THE TOP 3 PSEUDO APOSTLES OF THE MORMON CHURCH!!!

I've learned from the best and my goals are set. Here is the list of me putting some insane deposits in the home bank account.

• 8:00 AM - Answer the bell on last minute request for manly Elder's Quorum help. 
• I showed up anticipating a 2 hour struggle against a nasty garage; all I found was a 10x10 area of floor that needed to be painted. I laughed and left it to the others. Nice start!
• Visit THE DONUT and pick up 2 dozen circles of doom. 1 for my friend's family with a sick baby in the hospital, the second for my kids, because I am the greatest Dad in the history of sports. 
• There was much rejoicing. 
• Fix all of the wobbliest patio furniture on the planet. 
• Tightened every stupid bolt and screw on the table and chairs made by the Viet Cong. Even a morbidly obese man like me can now sit and eat without fear in my back yard. Winning.
• I even scored some wood oil and spent and hour going to town. Grammie helped! 
• Manually aerate trouble spots on the lawn and apply patch master mulch. 

• DONE. 
• Program garage door and fix the Boss's home-link in her vehicle so she can start parking in the garage. 
• Nailed it in like 5 minutes. I'm on fire!
• Fix my sunglasses. 
• After examination I determined they were crap and threw them away. 
• Scrub all the toilets and tubs in the house
• Got the Lizard to do this after I pulled her out of bed at 12:30... PM.  
• Propane tank exchange
• Slaughtered. 
• Install USB and plug outlet in the kitchen
• My back nearly froze in that bent over position, but success was mine. 
• Acquire and assemble a full yard of solar accent lights. 
• Full of Win. Boss may get ticked about my fetish, but I love me some lighting!
• Costco Run on a Saturday
• Destroyed it. 
• Fix broken handles on the kid's vanity
• Took another blasted trip to Home Depot and a creative washer, but I overcame. 

Then around 5PM I'm told my bathtub is once again leaking into the downstairs ceiling, there is a huge pool of water and I've got a major problem on my hands. Can I just say ---