Sunday, January 17, 2010

The Truth about this Blog

None of you guessed, but it was my intention all along. This blog is a Horcrux. Think about it.

I pour the essence of my soul into this blog, just like Tom Riddle and his "Diary." Like Tommy, I have the power to make my readers do things against their own will... such as watching 80s BMX dance videos. For you folks that are clueless on what I'm talking about and would like to know how or why I captured the essence of my soul in this blog, check out the following link. http://www.wikihow.com/Create-a-Horcrux (the tips and warnings must be read!)

So who did I kill to for this maniacal plot to live forever? The cool side of myself... by writing this post. Ouch the truth hurts, but now I can never die. Unless Google's "cloud" servers are destroyed. And that won't happen because we all know that "cloud" will become Skynet, which means I will become the Terminator and the T-1000 and travel through time to preserve this blog, not to win some stupid war with puny humans.

8 comments:

Fletch said...

Chainsaws? Really? Chainsaws? What in the world makes you think this is a good place to put an ad for that? I just put up one of the nerdiest posts of my life!

Incredible that I'm getting real spam comments. Not sure if this is a good or a bad thing, but I may have to start deleting them. In the meantime, I'll savor my newfound "sucess" in controlling someone with my horcrux.

Julie Fletcher said...

You are such a DORK. I told you not to post this and now everyone will think you are such a nerd! Is there any way you can delete this?

Katie said...

Julie, this is why Jake isn't allowed to have his own blog.

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Daniel said...

I guess broadcasting to the world that you're trying to become one of the darkest bloggers of all time has attracted loads of death eaters.

Don't worry, though, Volde-F-Word, like my true alter-ego, "I[] want [you] finished, and I[] want to be the one to do it!"

You can hide your horcruxes in the cloud (seemingly untouchable), but "untouchable" didn't stop me from destroying a seventh of Vmart's soul, hidden in an impregnable, inferi infested cavern, submerged in crazy potion.

Oh, did I mention I also took care of the other six, as well?

Yes, Volde-F-Word, you're going down, for the sake of bloggering families and children everywhere!

Fletch said...

Just great. Now the chosen one is going to use his endless stream of luck to stop me.

You drank the last of the felix potion and all that propecy balloney was not related to me. You'll have to watch the terminator franchise to figure out how to beat me.

Daniel said...

Fine, I'll just hire the Governator to take you down, then.

Daniel said...

Yes, I love the death eater bots!!!