There Will Be Blood

That was flat out one of the most disgusting playoff wins I've even witnessed from the Broncos. It feels like we got our rear-ends handed to us, and yet we won that game by more than 3 points. If I had to get a picture to show how weak our offense looked, this would be it.

On paper, that offense looks like it should be pretty good. Hall of fame QB, two 700 yard rushers, all star talent at reciever. But no guts. Our O-line isn't great, but I can tell you switching from power to zone blocking schemes is not easy on the fly. Kubes is practically winning inspire of himself thanks to a stellar defense.

Honestly, I don't know if I can take another week of this. I love our D and it does win championships, but for PEYTON'S SAKE YOU GOTTA SCORE A FLIPPING TOUCHDOWN MORE THAN ONCE IN 28 DRIVES IN THE POST SEASON!! 

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGH!!!

The blasted Patriots will show up next week just quivering with anticipation to break Peyton's neck. Seriously. Did you see that hit he took? Dad gum. No wonder Archie can't watch. I'd be freaked out too. I know I'm the worst kind of fan. But you know what?

This is all just supposed to be entertainment. Right? MY BLOOD PRESSURE CAN'T TAKE IT! I'M GONNA KYLO REN ALL OVER THE TV IF I HAVE TO KEEP WATCHING THAT PATHETIC OFFENSE. 

Like the title of this post, sooner or later, there will be blood. I just don't know if its worth the emotional suffering anymore. Here's to hoping we get a little vinegar in that gas tank and max out that electric engine and get some sort of turbo boost on that Prius. Go Broncos.

Nostalgia & The Prequels

I'm still basking in my Force Awakens afterglow, and all these good vibes got me thinking about my favorite moments in the franchise. But before I get into stuff from the original trilogy (IV-VI), I must share with posterity my top 5 moments or amusing junk from these films (yes, I acknowledge they exist).

5. I HAVE THE HIGH GROUND!!! Obi-Wan is the undisputed master of this realm. In the Phantom Menace, the completely breaks this rule by jumping over Darth Maul and cutting him in half. Later he continues this winning streak against "the chosen one" by defending the high ground.

4. Death Sticks - Really? Creativity in names reaching an all-time low, but hilarious nonetheless!

3. Sith Seduction - With no help at all from Hayden Christensen, McDiarmid managed to make his corruption and seduction of Anakin captivating at the bubble show and in front of his awesome sith mural. 

2. Well Hello There! - Once again Obi Wan delivers with a full on Force directed surge of BOLDNESS. 

Say what you will, this was an awesome fight scene. Took me totally off guard the first time I saw it.

1. DARTH MAUL - The fight with Qui Gon and Obi Wan is easily my favorite moment from the prequels. The music, robe throw-down, the choreography, double bladed lightsaber, zen meditation, caged prowling, death and righteous indignation. I still get pumped when I watch this fight scene. Now if only they could have kept Lord Maul around...

 And that prowl is what I did for many more years to come, waiting for the Force Awakens. 

Broncos Fever & the Gridiron Gods

Tonight the Broncos did right. Despite some terrible play, they managed to win a tough game and secure top seed in the AFC. But they don't feel like a #1 seed to me. I just don't know what to expect from our offense. Brock seemed to stabilize our system, but Peyton shows glimpses of his former cyborg in a comeback win. I now post this homemade Broncos Wallpaper for your pleasure (ping me for the full-size png if interested).

Nothing against Brock, but you've got to let Peyton play this out. He's earned it and to not let him start at this point would be an insult. If anything this season worked out perfectly. We managed to get a #1 seed and rest Peyton for nearly half the season. Not to mention the first round bye. This is the best shot he is going to get at being rested and prepared for a post season push to win another title and exercise some of his demons and silence his critics. So I now offer this sacreligous prayer that should not be taken seriously.

GODS OF THE GRIDIRON, 

YOU WHO LOOK DOWN ON PUNY MORTALS THAT HONOR YOUR GAME WITH BLOOD; HEAR MY CRY.

SHED FORTH THY FAVOR ON YOUR IRON SON. 

BLESS HIS FEET TO NOT DANCE, 
HIS CAGE TO BE UN-RATTLED, 
AND ABOVE ALL, GIRD UP HIS NECK AGAINST THE FURY OF HIS FOES.  

FORTIFY HIS PROTECTORS WITH THE WISDOM TO PICK UP THE BLITZ,
DELIVER DOZENS OF PANCAKES,
AND THE FURY TO DOMINATE IN THEIR GROUND ASSAULT.
MAY OUR RUSHERS GO DOWNHILL,
AND GIVE OUR RECEIVERS STICKY FINGERS, SOFT HANDS AND THE GIFT OF MAKING TOAST

SHINE ON OUR "D" WITH THE POWER OF AGGRESSION,
AND THE WILL TO DOMINATE ALL LIFE.
BLESS THEM WITH 4-MAN PRESSURE, GAP RESPONSIBILITY, SHUT DOWN COVERAGE AND MANY, MANY SACKS. 

GIVE US WHAT IS BEST IN LIFE.
TO CRUSH OUR ENEMIES AND HEAR THE LAMENTATION OF THE WOMEN.  

GRANT YOUR IRON SON ONE FINAL TRIUMPH 
TO HONOR THE SPORT OF KINGS.
MAY THIS VICTORY BE WORTHY OF FIRE, TEARS AND A SUNSET INTO THE GLORIOUS HORIZON.

AMEN. AND AH-MEN.